Cracks, bricks and spiders, what do they all have in common? They are all enormous in the Alice in Wonderland world of modern art.
None of the above recent offerings of the Tate Modern, shrunk it to its normal size, would be able to command the respect, gravitas and price tag commensurate with an ‘important’ artist’s work. If fact the mathematical formulae for calculating an artwork’s importance (as any curator worth his Rolex will tell you) is: D²=$³, where ‘d’ is dimensions. Which prestigious gallery or fat-wallet art buyer is going to fork out £250,000 for a 2 inch spider or 30cm crack?… even if it is badly made and unconvincing. They’re not stupid; they know real art is BIG.
The fact is that size does matter and for the vast majority of recent art offerings the only quality that impresses is quantity. Would the dreadful ‘make-your-own wooden-dinosaur-in-16-easy-to-cut-out-pieces Angel of the North’ have got moor space if it had only take up one sod rather than four fields? And how much would Gormely have dared to overcharge for it if it had, eh?
My sincere apologies to the manufacturers of the fine wooden dinosaur shown, no slur was intended by comparing your product to Gormely’s but try as I might I really couldn’t find anything quiet as lumpen, crude, inelegant and generally ‘un-angel like’ as Gormely’s ‘Eyesaur of the North’.
P.S. I notice your dinosaur sell for just £9.99, you should think bigger.
Classix Board Games 